Smell my feet

Holidays become less and less exciting as you get older. I’ve noticed that. And it kinda sucks. I refuse to wait by my front door and hand out candy to ungrateful little kids. If they can buy a costume, they can buy their own damn candy. Call me the Ebenezer Scrooge of Halloween.

In other news.

I woke up this morning tired as a motherfucker. But that’s nothing new. What’s new is that I woke up with a swollen right eye. When I looked in the mirror, I looked like I went to sleep with a mask on (just in time for today, ha). Not cool. The swelling has since gone down, but it’s still red if you look reeeeeally close. Oh, and it hurts when I blink. This has happened a few times before, randomly of course. I’ve never found out the cause. Maybe there’s some new species of insect that likes to feed on human eyelids in the night. Spooky.

And am I the only one not at all creeped out by this? Come on. His name is Darryl in the movie, but they didn’t even try to cover up Omarion’s “O” tattoo. Straight-to-DVD, it deserves to be.